Today is awful. Godforsaken awful and it is all I can to do not just find a bottle of something strong and drown my sorrows in it. Cora screamed bloody murder at the grocery store today. I actually thought they might call the cops because she was acting as if I had just kidnaped her. Gavyn fell asleep on the bus and didn't get off. But I was too busy wallowing in my own problems to notice the boys were late getting home. It is my dad's birthday and all I can think of is all the things in my life he missed and how you are actually missing even more of our kids' lives.
I am thinking I don't want to date ever again - but I hate being alone, lonely, and I long so badly for the companionship we once had. I hate life right now, and were it not for those kids, I swear to you, I think I would actually just end it.
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